The Best Dark Circle Corrector and Sleep Faker

Little metal roller balls on Boots’ Dark Circle Corrector make application a cooling, pleasing experience

There’s nothing like looking into the mirror, even after a solid eight hour’s sleep, and wondering if someone smudged reddish grey liner under your eyes in the middle of the night. Some of us have dark circles thanks to genetics, bone structure or luck of the draw, that for whatever reason, will not budge.

It’s tempting to admit defeat and go full-on with opaque concealer in the lightest shade, but you risk resembling a ‘reverse panda’’ or a tragic makeup victim with poor eyesight, as a thick coating of under-eye spackle is rarely kind to older skin. And while I love a good eye cream to mitigate crepey, crinkly skin, undereye circles need makeup, not just moisture.

Boots No 7 Dark Circle Corrector ($32CAN) is the happy marriage of hyaluronic acid to plump up the skin, cleverly selected pigments to neutralize those weird shadows (are they blue? Or are they red?) and light-diffusing particles to help illuminate those under-eye hollows. It also works well on the outer corners of your eyes. The effect is subtle and natural. No pandas here. Instead you’ll look serene and well-rested and like you got a film crew to follow you around, pointing high-wattage movie ‘fill’ lights at your face all day long.

Say No To Matte Foundation

Matte foundation is the ugly dad sneaker of makeup. It only looks good on young people.

If you are over 50, run far away from those deliberately ironic shoes (they won’t look cute on you, sorry) and run even faster from skin-deadening evil foundation with a matte finish. 

Matte foundation must have been the brainchild of an old and bitter person (trust me, I know a lot of them) who thought “Let’s take the most alluring and evanescent feature of youth -- luminous skin -- and hide it under a thick coat of paint.” 

Why the attraction to matte skin? I suppose if you’ve spent your entire life with a shiny face ceaselessly pumping out oil, the idea of a velvety, unreflective surface could be appealing. But really, do you want your face to have the spooky, other-worldly appearance of a synthetic wine cork? 

Even if you are blessed with oily skin in your late adult years, you doubtless now have lines around your eyes, which a matte formula will only emphasize. Once you start aging in earnest and your skin wrinkles up and the folds on your neck look like someone’s elbow, you do not need to accelerate the process. 

If you want the coverage that foundation brings, I get it. Just go for something hydrating and leave the industrial spackle to Flat Tummy Tea 'models' who look fine on Instagram but alarming in real life. 

The only matte item you can wear when you are older is bright lipstick. (And even then, a little dab of balm on top wouldn't kill you.) Anything on the pink to fuchsia continuum or a highly pigmented red I’ll allow. Never, ever a matte nude mouth (you’ll look like a Law & Order SVU corpse) or a matte brown (you’re not Kylie Jenner, so just stop.) 

And if I do see you in deadening, matte foundation and you are over 50, I am going to spit on a Kleenex and wipe it all off.